Friends and support

I went with Jayme to her grandma's to sit Shiva today.  I'm really glad I went.  I met a bunch of her family and heard great stories about her grandma and got to give Jayme a few big hugs and talk with her.

We went for a walk and talked about life, death, and everything in between.  I'm so glad we have each other to talk and vent about eating disorders, bipolar disorder, anxiety and self injury with.  Because we both have awesome significant others who are fantastic at listening and supporting us through this stuff, but they don't GET IT.  They've never lived or struggled through what Jayme and I have.  She can say something and I understand exactly.  I say something and she understands exactly.  It's almost scary how much alike our minds work.
As our walk was ending she mentioned she hopes that we never end up triggering each other.  But I honestly don't think we ever will.  Neither does she.  She said "as long as we're always honest with each other, i'm sure we'll be fine".  and I dont feel like i'm in a place where i could be triggered, or get to place where i could trigger her. Plus, we're both far along in our recoveries that we're not actively engaging in ED behavior and aside from last week's brick-wall-meets-andi's-hand incident, SI hasn't been much of an issue, either.  I know it isn't for her anymore.
Besides, we never talk about specifics.  We talk in general terms- mostly about the anxiety behind things and the hell of being bipolar and medications and stupid doctors, and vent about our idiot classmates.

So yeah- I'm glad we have each other.  And I'm glad I was able to go and be there with her today.

My doctor appointment is tomorrow...  I almost picked up the results from my GP today on the way to Jayme's house- but since I'd be able to interpret the results, I didn't think it was a good time to see them....

Nathan has an appointment tomorrow morning at the VA hospital to get his heart checked out again since it's been years since it was last checked (he has a progressive heart valve condition).  I'm nervous about that, and amazed at how calm he is about the whole thing.  He's such a great example for me. He's my rock.