lines

I wasn't entirely truthful with my T last week. I see her next week. Well, this Thursday, so I guess it's this week already. I know I should be honest with her. But ED screams at me to lie.

Yesterday I thought of emailing my dietician to ask what the max about of exercise I can do is. But ED screamed at me not to do that. So I'm putting it off.


I'm tired. And hardly sleeping.


Last week I had to make a list for my T of warning signs that I was crossing "the line".
I failed to tell her the signs were already there and lines were definitely being crossed.

i can't remember if i took my beta blocker yet or not.
i don't think i have. but usually i take it earlier than this.
hm.



i hope i can sleep tonight.


i really feel like cutting.
and i know THAT will help me to sleep.
tempting.