I'm lucky to have him.

Nathan ended up getting everything done early and we were able to hang out tonight.  I told him all about what's been going on.  I told him i'll probably be crabby and anxious for the next few weeks as i try to adjust to a lower amount of exercise.  He's so understanding.  He doesn't judge me or get mad or upset for me falling back into this.  He was happy that I reached out to Lisa and was willing to start cutting back.  He still claims he has no idea how I could lose weight.  He asked "where would it come from?"  And he understands that it isn't all about weight... that it's deeper than that. Seriously- he's amazing.  I couldn't ask for a more understanding, patient, and compassionate man than him.  He doesn't freak out when I mess up.  He just lets me talk through it and offers support.  He never criticizes.  and I'm never ashamed to tell him anything. 
I told him I was upset with myself that I fell back into the compulsive exercise.  and that I don't know how or when it happened.  but i know he'll support me through this.

my goal for next week is to replace some of the workouts i do at home with yoga.  i do vinyasa yoga, so it's still kind of intense, but certainly not as much as the other stuff.  This way i'd still be doing something, but burning less calories.  I asked lisa in tonight's check in if that sounded reasonable.  i think it does, but again, i can't always trust my judgement with this.

oh, and day two of lent:  i reached my protein goal!