had a whopping 3.5 hours of sleep last night. i could have slept in- but i had a screaming natalie and avery this at 7:30 this morning, so well- there went that idea.
this exhaustion is not helping my moods or outlook on life.
i gave into the SI urges last night because it was almost 4am and i was simply at my wits end. i had to do something to get me to sleep.
i should write my paper or study for parasit or immunology.
but i think im going to crash on the couch and watch the last stage of the Tour of California instead.
if i don't sleep tonight, i'm going to lose it.
i don't have too much left in me right now.
About Me
- Andi
- United States
- I'm a nerd and am about to graduate with a medical science degree and work in a hospital diagnostics lab, I'm in love and about to get married, I'm a recovering eating disordered person who is currently winning the battle. I am an aunt, I am a little sister, I am Catholic, I am driven. I am me.
3 comments:
"i don't have too much left in me right now"
ditto.
Hi, I just found your blog and I have been reading some of it. I used to have anorexia and depression also and I can identify with so many things that you are writing.
I read that you are afraid of getting pregnant because it would mean that you can't take you meds, but there are actually meds you can still take during pregnancy. I'm pregnant right now and I'm taking zoloft and buspar. You have to discuss it with your psychiatrist and your Ob doctor. I just want you to know that it is possible. I find that the hardest part about being pregnant (and this is my 3rd) is to gain the weight, and then also to lose it in a safe and controlled way afterwards. But it's possible, and with the right help and support we can do it. Take care!
I've been reading your blog, too, but was afraid to comment (congrats on the new baby on the way!!!)
I can't take my meds while pregnant- ive checked. I somehow feel calmer about it now... I know Nathan will be there with me, and I know I'll some how get through it. Plus it won't be for another 6 years, so I'm trying to focus on one thing at a time- like planning our wedding!
Im nervous about the weight-gain, too. Hopefully in 6 years I"ll be far enough along with recovery that I'll be okay.
I'm feeling good about things right now... It's kind of weird!
thanks for your comment.
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