i still am surprised that i'm more angry at my mom than i am at my dad... even though i get along so much better with her than him.
when i had to write letters to them at rogers (not to be sent), the one to my mom was a lot longer and a lot angrier.
i hadn't been expecting that.
i brought that up with susan today.
i wonder if i'll ever work up the nerve to tell them everything.
it almost doesn't seem fair to me to not tell them.
i know there were a lot of factors leading to the behaviors- but my parents are HUGE contributors.
i need them to know that.
i need to pop their ignorant bubble that i've been protecting for all of these years.
i'm tired of protecting it.
About Me
- Andi
- United States
- I'm a nerd and am about to graduate with a medical science degree and work in a hospital diagnostics lab, I'm in love and about to get married, I'm a recovering eating disordered person who is currently winning the battle. I am an aunt, I am a little sister, I am Catholic, I am driven. I am me.
3 comments:
you shouldn't have to protect them. they are adults. they can handle it.
their job was to protect you.
i understand how difficult it is. would they be willing to meet with susan for a family session or two? i could never have talked to my parents about all of it unless i had support with me. and we set up rules so that we didn't discuss it outside of family therapy. that way they couldn't "gang up on me." (even if that's not their intent, it's how it feels)
i keep reminding myself of that. that they should take care of themselves... but it goes again many years of thinking.
i've thought about having susan there.
i don't know if they'd be able to not talk about it at home, though. they're stubborn.
we'll see.
That's what susan is there for. To make sure they understand why you can't talk about it at home. Parents listen to authority figures more than they listen to their own children. So let Susan play the authority figure role.
and yes, it does go against years of thinking. I still fall into the same communication style with my parents when I'm with them too long. It's what we were trained to do.
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